Sunday, September 9, 2012

Mom's Fashion Rules

I don't know about you, but my mother taught me the rules of fashion.  Here they are:

  • Don't wear horizontal stripes.  They make you look fat.  Solids are good.
  • Shoes should match your pants.
  • Matching is good.  As in "wear matching separates."
  • Never, and I mean NEVER, wear white before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.

I never said I was a good listener.

#1- As I type this post I am wearing a horizonally striped dress.  Oh well.  It is comfortable and stylish and I am fat, so what the heck?
Here's me today.
  Here's Mom with Senator Margaret Chase Smith.  I bet she was wearing maroon shoes.

#2-  I only wear Birkenstocks because of my Plantar Fasciitis, so in the winter I have black and brown and a wierd shade of grayish-green.  Basically my shoes never match my pants.  Honestly, I think this rule ws so that Mom could buy green shoes whenever she saw them.

My collection of Birkenstocks.  Smiley shoes.  Not fashionable, but comfortable.
Check out those matching blue shoes. 

#3- Matching is no longer in.  Heck, you can buy mismatched socks on QVC!  My mom would be horrified.

On occasion I do match.  And on occasion I wear real shoes- for no more than 3-4 hours, once or twice a week.  Like today I was wearing cute matchy shoes with my dress, but despite repeated instructions to Reed, he still cut off my feet in the above photo.  So. . . here's what they looked like.

#4-  I bet you all think I break this one, huh?  But no.  This is an inviolable law of fashion.  My mother would haunt me if I wore white today- even though it is 90 degree out.  The day after Labor Day I packed away my white skirts, capris, and sandals.   (I dug the sandals out for the shoe photo.  Notice that they are two years old and the least worn.)

I thought this was a universal law, but apparenly not.  At Church today there were many women wearing white skirts (*gasp*) and even more wearing white sandals (*horrors*)!  As for me and my daughters (Non-Existent Category) we will follow the rule. 

And you thought I was dis-obedient.  Hah.