In Despair

It's late on December 23rd.  I have been hustling and bustling for the past few days with Christmas events, projects, and tasks.  I stayed up after everyone else went to bed to wrap a few presents that showed up tonight courtesy of Amazon and Brown (UPS).  And then, before I went to bed, I decided that I would jump on FB for a minute to see what everyone was doing to prepare for the holiday.  I truly expected it to be a feed full of happy faces and holiday cheer.

But no.  It is filled with posts that are disagreeable and hateful.  The message is always the same.  This is MY OPINION and if you don't share it, you are WRONG and STUPID.  I was called a jerk for carrying a gun.  I was assaulted with rude images about Christmas by someone who professes to be all about love.  I saw someone who expressed an honest concern about a situation be skewered by his "friends."  It happens all the time.

All I can think about is the third verse of "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day.

And in despair I bowed my head:
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men."

So, I have taken action. I just realized that I can unfollow people and still stay friends with them.  That way I can go check on them when I feel prompted to, but I don't have to be assaulted by their negative posts.  The funny thing is, it is not usually
THEIR words.  It is the crappy, hateful memes that they share.  I feel bad about this, because I want to know what is going on in the world and to understand all the different facets of the problem.  I want to hear opinions that make me uncomfortable and challenge my view of the world.  But I am no longer willing to let those people pretend that they are acting out of love and concern when they are really just being hateful.

My gift to myself this Christmas?  A more peaceful and kind FB feed.  Unfortunately, I will miss out on some information from family and friends.  Oh, well.  Hopefully I can get back to the last two verses in the next couple of days.

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead, nor doth he sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail,
With peace on earth, good will to men."

Till, ringing singing, on its way,
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime,
Of peace on earth, good will to men!

To be popular.

I was never one of the popular girls in school. I longed to be like those graceful, nymph-like creatures who always looked good in their clothes, had every hair in place, and had boys following them around- happy to be at their beck and call. I on the other hand, was always overweight and could not look good in the latest fashions. (That is a blessing in retrospect. . . not too many pictures of me in the traditional garb of the 1980's!) My hair was a disaster. It had enough curl so that I could not wear straight styles and it wasn't curly enough to be pretty. On top of that, it was so thin that when I put it in a pony tail it had a diameter of about 1/2 inch. It always was a mess. No guys were following me around, carrying my books. I was a teen age failure in my warped mind.

What I was, I can now see in retrospect, was a geek. Yup. I loved playing the clarinet. That's pretty geeky all by itself, but I took it to the extreme and practiced a couple of hours a day. I got straight A's without trying too hard. Except in Algebra and I don't want to discuss THAT. I sang in the chorus and actually liked wearing all white and singing "We are the World." I was on the Hi-Q team, which is fairly similar to the Academic Decathlon program. I really enjoyed having a wide range of knowledge about a lot of odd subjects. I left the math to Kyle. That was his gig. To top it all off, I found the Drama Club my Junior year and acted in several plays. Since all my friends were apparently geeks, too, we had a lot of fun and never criticized each other.

Although I wasn't popular like I wanted to be, I was respected and I had a lot of friends. I even got elected Class President my Sophomore year.

If I had to sit down and list my friends, it would be a difficult task because I have lived in different places and been involved in different sub-cultures. (Don't worry- nothing too radical- just dog shows, karate, digi scrapping, and the like!) So imagine my surprise when I noticed today on Facebook that I have 350 friends. A lot of the people I would have on my friend list don't even have a Facebook page so it mde me wonder who these people really are. Luckily there was an application to assist me in figuring this out.

Here are the results:

34 friends are under the zodiac sign of Taurus (including my DH. . . I can put up with a lot of bull)
22 friends like country music best (not much clarinet in country music)
14 friends enjoy hiking (sick puppies)
73% female friends, 27% male friends (that actually surprises me since I hang out in a Scout uniform so much)
34% single, 66%taken (apparently I need to brush up on those matchmaking skills)
21% democrats/ 79% republicans (duh. I live in Utah!)

For some strange reason I just analyzed my friend list and came up with the following information. Please be aware that the percentages do no add up to 100% because I did not round anything and just used whole numbers.

Scrap Girls 22%
Ward Friends 16%
Family Friends 16%
Heritage Makers Friends 12%
Former Students 11%
School Buds (any grade) 10%
Scouting Friends 5%
Friends of my Children 3%
Family 3%
My Teachers 1%
People I Worked With 2%
Other 3%
People who need to NOT be my friends for various reasons 2% (like I have no idea who you are or how you got to be my friend)

I'm feeling pretty popular right now! Not because I'm thin and beautiful and have perfect hair (although it is a lot better now that it is short and I have learned to use gel) but because I have been blessed to cross paths with many people throughout my journey who like me enough to consider me a "friend." I am still a geek- well proved by the fact that 34% of my friends are digital divas like myself and think that Photoshop and Studio are the computer hotspots! But I must be a cool geek since about 14% of my friends are young whippersnappers.

Luckily I only have a couple of "friends" who are around because I am running for public office and I hope it stays that way. Although it would be nice to be popular on November 3rd. . .